Report by Stuart Carapola, PWInsider
This week’s show opens with a video package taking a look back at what an asshole Mr Anderson is, and then his change of heart and newfound alliance with Jeff Hardy, and finally the incident that ended last week’s Impact when Anderson, possibly accidentally, possibly intentionally, hit Jeff Hardy with a chair.
In fact, here comes Mr Anderson now, striding out to the ring with a chair in his hands. He skips the introduction and asks if there are any Creatures of the Night here (getting a nice pop), and then he introduces the leader of the Creatures of the Night, Jeffrey Nero Hardy. Anderson says that last week, he hit Hardy in the back with a folding chair, from behind, when he wasn’t looking, but he wants Hardy to know he didn’t do it on purpose. Anderson gets a mild boo for that one. He says that he didn’t hit him on purpose, because if he did, he’d tell Hardy about it, and would probably tell the whole world about it. He’d be proud and brag about it because he’s an asshole. Hardy breaks out in a big smile and applauds Anderson, who says that the world would be a better place if there were more assholes in it, and that’s what makes the Impact Zone a great place, because it’s full of assholes. Big pop for that one. Anderson proposes a solution: Anderson’s going to bring the chair to the ring for their match tonight and if he uses it on Hardy, it’ll mean Hardy has a problem with him. If Hardy uses it on Anderson, he probably has it coming, but he’ll know he has a problem with Hardy. Anderson takes his chair with him and leaves.
Backstage, AJ Styles says he knows all about stylin’ and profilin’, and when you’re on top everybody loves you, but now AJ is disappointed in himself and has to prove himself tonight against Kazarian, so he hopes Flair is happy with the consequences.
Still backstage, Jeff Hardy says he always questions people who hit him with chairs, but he guesses he’ll find out where Anderson’s at tonight.
Time to head to the ring for our first match…
Frankie Kazarian vs AJ Styles
AJ jumps Kazarian before the bell, and they trade armdrags, then go toe-to-toe with rights before Kazarian goes to the eyes. The referee pulls Kazarian away from Styles, and AJ goes to the eyes and sends Kazarian to the corner where he puts the boots to him. Kazarian whips AJ to the corner and follows in with a monkey flip, then gets a running dropkick to the chest that sends AJ bouncing off the corner like a pinball. Kazarian covers for 2 then HITS THE CHINLOCK as Flair comes strolling out. AJ escapes and gets his sweet dropkick to Kazarian, then a really weak looking neckbreaker that I guess was supposed to look crisp, but actually looked like he barely touched him. AJ with a backbreaker for 2, and now AJ HITS THE CHINLOCK! Flair looks happy with what he sees. AJ goes for the Styles Clash, Kazarian tries to reverse to his backdrop piledriver, AJ reverses that to another Styles Clash attempt, Kazarian escapes that, and AJ finally finishes a move with a fireman’s carry into a neckbreaker. AJ goes for another neckbreaker but Kazarian holds the ropes and follows up with a springboard legdrop for 2. Kazarian puts AJ up top and goes for the Flux Capacitor, but AJ knocks him off the top and goes for the springboard 450, Kazarian moves but AJ lands on his feet and hits the Pelle Kick. Kazarian backdrops AJ to the apron and kicks him in the ribs, then gets a slingshot bulldog onto the apron and both men wind up out on the floor and get counted out. That did not seem like ten seconds to me.
AJ and Kazarian continue fighting after the match, but Flair gets in the ring and says that they’re two of the best wrestlers alive and this is over now. He says the fans aren’t going to divide them, and that both of them are a special breed of wrestlers. He’s signed them up for a match on the PPV this weekend, and isn’t going to say against who, but they’d better get it together or they won’t be a part of Fortune.
Meanwhile backstage, Angelina Love takes her shirt off, but she has her back to us so we can’t see her thingies.
We’re back, and it looks like we’re heading back to the ring for another match…
Daffney vs Angelina Love
Crowd is cheering for Daffney. Angelina goes to a wristlock, but Daffney counters to a double armbar. Angelina looks bored, and rams a couple of knees to Daffney’s ribs and then nails her with a pair of clotheslines before going to a side headlock. Daffney fights her way out, but Angelina goes for a leg lariat and misses by a mile, but luckily this is postproduced so they’re able to kind of cover for it. Angelina HITS THE CHINLOCK! Daffney drops down and gives Angelina a jawbreaker and a front powerslam, then another. Angelina with a flatliner for the win.
Winner: Angelina Love
Angelina grabs the mic and says Madison Rayne is watching this from home because she doesn’t have the balls to be here, but she wants Madison to know that this weekend, she’ll become the first four time Knockouts Champion. Madison and her balls come out and tell Angelina that they’ve underestimated her, and she needs to make one thing clear: if she’s going to put her title on the line, Angelina needs to put something on the line too. Her fake funbags and cheap weave aren’t good enough, so she wants Angelina to put her career on the line. Angelina says that’s fine, but there’s one other thing: she met with the championship committee, and there will be another stipulation for the match: if Lacey Von Erich or Velvet Sky interfere, Madison’s going to get disqualified and Angelina will be handed the Knockouts Title.
Still to come tonight, RVD will face Samoa Joe in a first time ever match!
We go backstage to Brother Devon, and the Mystery Questioner asks him what he’s going to say to him (I assume he meant Brother Ray), and Devon says we’ll all find out.
We go to a video package detailing the history of the Jesse Neal-Brother Ray feud, and then we go to the ring with Brother Devon, Jesse Neal, and Shannon Moore. Devon says this whole thing has gotten out of control, and he calls Brother Ray out to sort this whole thing out once and for all. Ray stands in the aisle, so Devon says fine, but he doesn’t get it. The two of them trained Jesse just like they train, and Ray was the one to interview him when he came to the school. Jesse was the first to arrive at the school and the last to leave, and he’s shown nothing but respect since day one. He was already through hell long before he came to their school when he served his country, and his ship got blown up by terrorists, and in the process, his best friend was killed in that blast, and he was the one who had to put his body in a bodybag and carry the casket. So, Devon’s going to put it this way: what is Ray’s problem with Jesse? Ray says first of all, he doesn’t answer to Devon because he’s Brother Ray and he’s the leader of Team 3D, and Devon answers to him. Devon starts to talk, but Ray tells him to shut up. Ray says his problem is with Jesse because he’s nothing but a disrespectful punk and now he has a problem with Devon for being an unloyal partner. He asks where’s Devon’s loyalty for his partner, who made him. Devon says his loyalty is with the both of them, he’s never picked sides and never will. Ray says things are about to get a lot worse, because he just spoke to Eric Bischoff, and the match at Victory Road will be Brother Ray vs Jesse Neal…vs Brother Devon. After Victory Road, they’ll either continue into further glory or it’ll all end that night.
We’re back, and it’s time for TNA’s boneheaded free TV giveaway match of the week…
TNA World Champion Rob Van Dam vs Samoa Joe
This is non-title, in case you were curious. Why they’re giving this match away on TV is beyond me. Tieup to start and nobody moves, so they go toe to toe instead then kick for kick, but RVD gets the upper hand with the stepover leg lariat. RVD goes up top for the Five Star Notebook Splash, but Joe pops up and nails him and tries to go for the Muscle Buster, but he can’t get it, so he tosses RVD off the top and he lands face first on the ramp. Joe follows him to the floor and lays into him with a stiff chop then tosses him back in the ring. RVD catches Joe coming in with a spinkick and sends him back out to the floor. RVD tries a baseball slide to the floor but Joe dodges by rolling back in the ring and then he hits a dive to RVD on the floor. Tommy Dreamer and his buddies come out of the back and take their usual seats in the crowd as Joe rolls RVD back in the ring and covers for 2. Joe with the snapmare and kick to the back, but RVD ducks another kick and rolls Joe up for 2 then hits him with a dropkick. RVD opens up with kicks to Joe and chokes him in the corner with his boot. RVD with a slingshot legdrop to Joe on the apron, then RVD rolls back in and covers Joe for 2. Joe pops up and starts firing back on RVD, RVD returns with some rights of his own and comes off the ropes right into a crisp powerslam by Joe for 2. Joe with a snapmare and we HIT THE CHINLOCK! RVD gets to his feet and elbows his way out of the chinlock, then hits Joe with a spinkick but Joe rips his head off with a clothesline for 2. Joe kills RVD with a chop in the corner, then whips him to the opposite corner and RVD moves out of the way of the knee and hits a springboard jumpkick out of the corner for 2. RVD with a diving dropkick and Rolling Thunder for 2. RVD goes up top and hits a top rope jumpkick for 2, then nails Joe with a running spinkick in the corner, but Joe kills RVD with another killer clothesline. RVD tries a rolling move in the corner, but Joe catches him coming in and hits the STJoe and a powerbomb for 2, RVD kicks out but Joe turns it right into a modified Boston Crab. RVD starts to slip out so Joe turns it to a half crab, but RVD finally makes the ropes for the break. Joe argues with the ref so RVD nails him from behind, but Joe responds with headbutts, RVD tries a schoolboy rollup but Joe counters into the Kokina Clutch, and RVD kicks off the top turnbuckle and rolls over Joe’s shoulders for the win.
Winner: Rob Van Dam
Great match that they NEVER should have given away on TV. Joe looks shocked and slowly gets off the mat and stares down RVD as he leaves the ring. Joe continues arguing with the ref and eventually slaps him, then gives him the Muscle Buster. Joe sits up and stares off into space with a faraway look in his eyes, then finally rolls out of the ring and heads to the back.
Backstage, Kurt Angle says that he works well under pressure, and it makes him do what he does best, and that’s wrestle. He’s been in the ring with Anderson in the past, and he knows he can’t trust him, and he warns Jeff Hardy to be careful.
Back to the ring for more action…
Ladder Match: Douglas Williams vs Jeremy Buck
Williams chain wrestles Buck to start, then comes off the ropes with a shoulderblock. Buck with a back elbow and a springboard crossbody that sends Williams to the floor, but Buck dives out to the apron and hits a moonsault to the floor. Buck grabs the ladder and brings it into the ring and tries to climb it, but Williams comes back in and nails him. Williams puts Buck up top in the Tree Of Woe, then sets up the ladder and starts to climb. He takes too long though, and Buck recovers and hits a top rope dropkick to send Williams crashing off the ladder. Now Buck tries to climb, but Williams nails him and sets the ladder up in the corner and whips Buck into the ladder, but then he tries a charge and Buck moves, sending Williams crashing into the ladder. Buck whips him in a second time, but Williams nails him out to the apron. Williams tries to ram the ladder into Buck, but Buck with a dropkick through the ropes sending the ladder into Williams, then hits a slingshot facebuster on Williams on the ladder. Buck tries to climb and grab the X, but Williams with an electric chair to send Buck to the floor. Williams slowly climbs again, but Buck leaps off the top rope and sunset flips Williams off the ladder. Now Buck tries to climb again, Williams tries to dive off the top at him, but Buck sees him coming and kicks him as he comes off the top and climbs up to grab the X. Wow, didn’t expect that to happen.
Winner: Jeremy Buck
Williams is very upset about this and beats up the ladder.
We go to a segment with Alex Shelley, tag team specialist and children’s role model. His partner Chris Sabin used to be great, but that was before Sabin learned the evils of Beer Money. Shelley opens the door and shows a drunk Sabin sitting on the couch covered with dollar bills. We then see various clips of Sabin stumbling around and falling off the top rope to drive home what a couple of tools Beer Money are. He says to parents not to let this happen to their kids. I know I didn’t make it sound funny, but this was hilarious.
Matt Morgan & Beer Money vs Hernandez & Motor City Machine Guns
Roode & Sabin start out with a fast paced chain wrestling segment, Roode tries charging Sabin in the corner but Sabin gets the boot up and hits a Frankensteiner and a forearm for 1, then tags out to Shelley, and they hit a series of fast paced double team moves. This is a very fast paced match, as you can see. Storm tags in, but Shelley outmaneuvers them and tags in Sabin, who hits a leaping elbow in the corner on Storm. Sabin tries a flying headscissors, Storm sends Sabin to the apron and Morgan comes running in with a big boot to the face. Now Morgan tags in and hits a short clothesline on Sabin, then casually steps on him. Morgan stretches Sabin on the ropes and tags in Storm, who nails Sabin with a series of rights in the corner. Sabin comes firing back but Storm with a boot to the guy and a slam for 2. Roode comes in and chokes Sabin, then whips him hard into the corner for 2. Sabin and Roode trade blows but Sabin with a back spinkick and makes the hot tag to Hernandez, who comes in and starts rolling over both members of Beer Money. Hernandez goes after Morgan, but Morgan leaps off the apron, so Hernandez instead bowls over Roode with a shoulderblock and tags Shelley back in. Shelley whips Herhandez into the corner into Roode, then Hernandez slingshots Roode into a Shelley flatliner in the corner. Beer Money try to double team Shelley, but Hernandez with a double shoulderblock over the top rope lays both of Beer Money out. Hernandez chases Morgan to the back as the MCMG hit a double enziguiri to Roode. Storm tries to spit beer at Sabin but Sabin ducks and dropkicks Storm to the floor, then follows him out with a dive. Shelley with a springboard crossbody out of the corner, but Roode rolls through and hooks the tights for 3.
Winners: Matt Morgan & Beer Money
Backstage, the Pope says Anderson is a manipulator and you can’t trust him as far as you can throw him and that’s why he was out of action, but his focus right now has to be on Victory Road and his match with Kurt Angle, and Pope will have to bring his A-game to Victory Road.
Also backstage, Kevin Nash is sitting around complaining because he has to wait around for a meeting with Hogan. They discuss the differences between bringing Scott Hall & Sean Waltman and the Nasty Boys in, apparently Nash wants Hall and Waltman to be given another shot, but Hogan says it just isn’t going to happen.
Meanwhile, back in the ring, Jay Lethal is talking about how he was overwhelmed when Hogan made his match with Flair at Victory Road, and talks about how much it sucked to watch his brother get beat up by Ric Flair. He said it ripped his heart out, so in return, he’s going to rip Flair’s heart out. Lethal wants to tell his mom that he loves her very much, and he plans on making her the proudest mother in the world when he beats Ric Flair at Victory Road. Even though his mother is 1000 miles away, she’ll always be in his heart standing next to him. Uh oh, Flair’s music hits and out he comes. Flair says he could give a rat’s ass about Lethal’s mother, and in fact, his old lady is living vicariously through Lethal because she wants Flair. Flair says Lethal has three days to live, and he’s going to tell it like it is. He’s in the ring with Ric By God Flair, his Wrestlemania robe is in the Smithsonian. Lethal’s family may love him, but Flair’s family put him on the street at 15 and he became the Nature Boy. He’ll tell Lethal another thing: if a woman has felt the caress of the Nature Boy, she is changed for life. He’s got ex-wives running around wondering where he is, hence the saying ALL NIGHT LONG. He says Lethal dresses like a street punk from New Jersey, and Lethal has three days to think about it. Flair’s not a human, he’s a god, and he can have any woman he wants. Flair’s not a wrestling icon, he’s a living, breathing wrestling machine, and hospitals want him to donate his body parts to see what keeps him going. In three days, Lethal is going to look his god in the eyes, and he’s going to have his ass handed to him. Three days.
Before our main event, let’s take another look back at Anderson hitting Jeff Hardy with a chair last week, then run down the card for Victory Road.
It’s main event time!
Ken Anderson vs Jeff Hardy
The participants share a sportsmanlike handshake, then tie up. Hardy goes to the arm, loses it, then gets it back. Anderson shoots Hardy off into the ropes, but Hardy comes off with a shoulderblock. Hardy tries a hiptoss, Anderson blocks, Hardy fires a couple of rights at Anderson, but Anderson with a neckbreaker for 2. Hardy with a jawbreaker and then tries his springboard dropkick thing in the corner, but Anderson moves and Hardy crashes to the mat, allowing Anderson to cover him for 2. Anderson tries a whip but Hardy reverses to a short clothesline for 2. Hardy with a clothesline in the corner and then tries a bulldog, Anderson shoves him off into the turnbuckle and tries a charge but Hardy gets the elbow up and goes for the Whisper In The Wind and misses completely, but Anderson goes down anyway so Hardy covers him for 2. Anderson recovers and hits a Finlay Roll for 2, then goes up top and tries the Swanton, but Hardy moves and Anderson hits the mat. Hardy with the Twist Of Fate and that’s all she wrote.
Winner: Jeff Hardy
Hardy and Anderson share a laugh after the match, but not Abyss’ music hits and he comes out with the nail bat. Anderson and Hardy both attack Abyss but he lays both of them out. Abyss with a chokeslam on Hardy and a big boot to Anderson. Abyss picks the nail bat back up and swings it at Anderson, but Anderson moves and the bat digs into the turnbuckle. Abyss tries to wrench it free and ends up ripping the turnbuckle off. RVD comes running out and now he goes after Abyss, but Abyss grabs him by the throat and just flings him out to the floor. Now Hardy goes after Abyss, Anderson comes up behind him and yells at him to move, then he nails Anderson, and then RVD comes in, grabs the chair, and uses it to hit a Van Daminator on Abyss to send him scurrying out to the floor. RVD, Hardy, and Anderson all shake in the ring and RVD and Anderson have a staredown as we go off the air.